I Am Just Not Ready

Sorry for the lack of blogging yesterday, my day didn't quite go as planned!

Lily had her check up yesterday and we found out some unfortunate news! Lily's liver is unable to break down Copper. Copper is pretty much EVERYTHING both you and I eat, as well as dogs. Her liver is still in some sort of liver failure and she not out of the woods yet. I was just not ready to hear this diagnosis.

Our main goal right now is to restore her liver and to get her to eat. This is a struggle every day! Although the last 2 nights she has been willing to eat chicken on her own, instead of us hand feeding her or force feeding her! However, this morning she was having none of that, which only brought me to my breaking point - which included her getting on my lap and snuggling and me just crying on her shoulder and telling her how much she means to me and that I am being selfish because I am just not ready to let go. But I know deep down that she isn't either. She is here for a reason and is fighting this the best way she can. After my melt down I got her to eat a few spoonfuls.

We were told yesterday that Lily is a miracle! Most dogs that come in as sick as she was and with liver failure do not make it. Lily fought it and still is. Our vet didn't expect her to come in looking soo great yesterday. He is very happy with her progress, but was sure to inform me that we are not out of the woods yet. It could still go either way, but we are doing everything we can for her and it seems to be working. Eating is our biggest struggle, but her antibiotics are done tomorrow, so that might help with her appetite!

Lily's long-term treatment is rather costly, but M and I are both on the same page as far as that goes and we are willing to do what it takes. Lily is only 4! We are also trying to do what is best for her! We do not want her suffering at all! Our vet said, most people don't ever get to this diagnostic stage because the tests are too expensive and that they just assume it is a liver tumor and the dog passes.

Lily was on a medication called Slentrol, which we initially thought (and I still believe that it may have had something to do with this still -  it could have weakened her liver just enough to shut it down, but that is neither here nor there and there is no way to prove it) caused her hepatitis. Pfizer was fronting all diagnostic testing to try to rule out their drug, so they are luckily paying for all tests. The rest of the bill, including her hospitalization, meds and treatment is on us. We are still waiting to see how much Pfizer is paying first, but it should be about half of the bill! The chances of Lily having this copper storage problem was less than 5% and is not common in her breed. I was surprised to find out it is common in labs.

Overall Lily has lost 20 pounds. She is at her ideal weight right now of 95 pounds! I know that still seems like a lot, but she is a big dog!

I continue to ask for your prayers on Lily, and I continue to pray that she will pull through this! It is crazy how easily the tears will fall now when it comes to knowing her potential fate and I refuse to think that way!

Gracie's nose is getting a bit out of joint with all the spoiling of Lily, but she is also getting just as much attention. Gracie's life without Lily isn't life and I don't know what mine would be like either! Lily is my rock!! Praying my little miracle keeps fighting for her life!!

I have a feeling my weekend will be filled with a lot of snuggles and cuddles. I love that dog like crazy!!!  I am just not ready to let her go and I don't think she is ready either!!